I swear to god, it's like they come back from the dead every time. I just spent hours cleaning everything with that toxic stuff, and now they're just laughing at me. This is seriously fucked. I'm starting to think I should just burn the whole place down.

• What the hell do they even breed so fast?
• Dothey know about this?
• Am thinking about getting a cat.

Seriously, though

Bed Bug Bites: A Motherfucking Nightmare

You wake up in the morning feeling super itchy. You look down and see little red bumps all over your body. Your heart drops to your toes because you know, oh god you understand, it's bed bugs. Those tiny little blood sucking creatures have decided your mattress is their all-you-can-eat buffet and you, my friend, are the main course.

• Now you're screaming internally
• Checking every nook and cranny for those little bastards.
• You're burning your clothes

It's a fucking nightmare, and trust me, there's nothing more terrifying than dealing with a bed bug infestation.

This Damn Bed Bug Invasion Is Getting Out of Hand

It's freaking horrible, folks. These tiny bloodsuckers are attacking our homes non-stop. I mean, really, when did it become commonplace to have these things scuttling around your bed at night? We used to think bed bugs were a problem of the past, but now they're back with a fury that's just outrageous.

• We need to do something about this before our entire society becomes a full-blown bed bug catastrophe.
• I'm tired of checking my sheets every night for these creepy crawlies.
• This has gone too far anymore!

Damn Bed Bugs Have Me Screaming for Help!

These creeping terrors are making my life a living hell. I can't sleep read more because of the itching. My house is {infesteduncontrollably and I don't know what to do. Please, anyone, save me from these bugs!

• Please, someone tell me what to do!

Smash those Those Goddamn Bed Bugs

Those little bloodsuckers are the worst. They sting at night and leave you with itchy bumps. You're irritated because they won't go away, right? Well, don't panic! I've got some advice to help you destroy those pests for good. First things first, get yourself a good spray. Make sure it's specifically made for bed bugs because regular old bug spray won't work. You'll need to douse your whole mattress, box spring, and surrounding area. And don't forget about those spaces where they like to camp out. Once you've sprayed everything down, lock it in for at least 24 hours. Then, sweep up all the dead bugs and debris.

You also need to be careful when you're doing laundry. Bed bugs can live in your clothes, so wash everything on a hot setting and then toss it in the dryer on high heat for at least 30 minutes. If you have any toys that can't be washed, you can put them in the freezer for at least 72 hours. That will destroy any bed bugs hiding inside. Keep in mind, getting rid of bed bugs can take some time and effort. But if you keep trying, you can win the war against these irritating creatures.

I Can't Take These Damn Bed Bugs Anymore

These infuriating critters have invaded my apartment and I'm about to snap. I've tried everything, from essential oils, but these little bastards just won't quit. I'm so overwhelmed of it, I could cry.

• This has got to end
• I hate bed bugs with every fiber of my being